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Monday, March 31, 2008

from mind to matter

Rules still rule. I've gotten emails about the ones you're thinking about--keep them coming. In the meantime, here's another one I apply:

If you're serious about it (a change, a try, a goal) write it down. If you're really serious, even determined, say it out loud. To someone else.

In many cases when I've set a goal or suggested an action out loud and to someone else (sometimes a room full of else's) it's on pure impulse. Even as the words are falling out of my mouth I'm thinking, "I can't believe I'm CREATING a commitment to something that did not exist until I opened my mouth." Why can't I just keep it between me and other me...

and have the choice to NOT do it?

Because other me knows me better sometimes: I probably won't do it. And while a little more work is always required, I often like the results a whole lot better.

Here are some examples of when I can distinctly remember thinking as I was speaking, "what on earth am I saying this for? This was not prompted! No one is asking me to do this! I am creating this for myself!"

  • So, are we going to run Baltimore (marathon)? Four months later, I did
  • I'm going to start my own business. Six months later, I did
  • I think we should convene a group to provide feedback on this model (the group was 50+ all across the country and the turnaround time was about two weeks--but it happened)
  • Let's go camping for the weekend! (I like warm beds and hot showers but I actually enjoyed this a whole lot more than I ever thought I would, even though it was years ago now)
These are just a couple of light examples, but I know that people employ this method in a wide range of scenarios hoping to change a behavior, a practice, or a belief (e.g. eating patterns, exercising, a golf swing).

So even though saying it out loud and the steps thereafter involve a little bit of discomfort, as I've said before, discomfort often precedes positive change (though like a disclaimer in the ads, amount and time may vary).

Splurge-berry

Fresh, sweet, and blue blueberries. Lots of them.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I agree completelu. I say things out loud to create a commitment. I am willing and able to break a committment to myself- but not others. In fact, I think I will make a commitment when I am done here. At Christmas, while in the flury of making donations to various holiday charities, a friend of mine and I said that we were not just going to do it at Christmas this year, that since we were both doing a bit less than usual at the holiday,(we both had some unexpeceted expenses that strained our finances) that we were going to remember that it is easy to think of others at Christmas, but that there are people in need all year round. So just the other day I thought, we should put up a box at work and do a food drive, and when I sign off here I am going to email the HR guy and ask for permission.

Julie